Nick Page 5

  I thought I might have seen it a few times in the years before that and years since.

  But just like every time, it disappears.

  He stands up and gives me an uneasy smile. “I’ll go make you some. I have everything ready from this morning,” he says and moves away, leaving me in the room.

  I need to get a grip. I must be tripping if I’m thinking like this about Nick when Owen just hurt me so deeply.

  Who am I kidding? Even if there was some bizarre thing that could put us together, I couldn’t do it.

  I’m his best friend, so I have a first-class seat to what he’s like.

  Playboy.

  And playboys don’t take anything seriously.

  That’s not what I want.

  Nick

  It always gets to me when she looks at me like that.

  Those are the times that I have no idea what she’s thinking.

  It’s strange because her eyes are so open and free and it’s like all the answers are there but yet I can’t see them.

  It’s the strangest thing. It feels like getting the answers for a test, but you don’t know what questions the answers apply to. That’s how it feels to me when she looks at me like that.

  It doesn’t help that we both switch back effortlessly into the friends we are.

  That’s how it was for the whole day.

  I looked after her, arranged for her car to be picked up at the hospital, made her dinner when I rarely cook for myself, and took her home. All that time, we played the good friends we’re supposed to be.

  Tonight I’m at the sports bar with Tony and Bradford.

  The three of us all work together and also all played for the team. It was how we met.

  Tony and I went into scouting, and Bradford is an assistant to the coach.

  Rory, the coach’s second assistant, is missing from our pack tonight because he couldn’t drag his dick away from his latest catch: a stripper called Candi who works the same club that Rachel does. Except that Candi is literally a catch because the two have been seeing each other for the last month, and the guys are telling me that she quit the club.

  I’m a prick for even thinking it sounds like bullshit because don’t I have Rachel, who often frequents my bed?

  The guys are laughing at me. Wait until I tell them I’m not going to Vegas.

  Both Tony and Bradford are in good spirits because Brian agreed to back us and will be signing contracts next week. The next step is a meeting about the full business plan and projection for the next five years.

  This was an idea that the four of us wanted to do. I was the master behind the plan, but it’s the kind of thing you do with a bunch of people you’ve been crazy with since as long as I can remember.

  I’m hoping the good news will smooth over my absence in Vegas. The wedding is in two weeks and two days. I’m sure I can get them to forgive me by then.

  “Guys.” Tony raises his beer bottle. “This is to us and the billions were gonna make.”

  “Billions?” Bradford asks as we clink our bottles together.

  “Billions, man. The skies the limit. Why do you think we wanted Brian to back us? His name and Nick’s are the faces of this gig.”

  “Hey, what about me?” Bradford fumes, and we laugh.

  “What about you? You were a great wide receiver in your time, but let’s face it, man, you can’t beat this.” Tony points at me.

  I don’t like the attention. I was always like that. Just not wanting to make my head swell from the fame, much as I loved it.

  “How about all of us? We’re all former players. The kids will want to come for all of us,” I surmise, and they smile.

  “I like that,” Tony agrees.

  “Me too, makes me feel valuable.” Bradford raises his palms.

  “It’s gonna be a blast,” I add with a nod. I’m looking forward to setting up.

  The idea is to run a rigid summer camp for the six weeks of summer with all the right training. That means the kids can use the skills and endorsements from us to further their careers if they want to for college and playing pro ball.

  We want to take the best and have kids there that have real potential, so it’s going to cost a lot to get in, but I plan to run a sponsorship program—so if any kids do have potential and can’t afford it money won’t be an issue. I’m doing that from my own pocket. The guys don’t need to chip into that. I get paid the most out of the group, and I have more money than I can stand.

  “You think Rory will even make it to Vegas?” Bradford asks with a frown. “He’s ditched us every time we meet, ever since Candi.”

  “He better not fucking ditch us!” Tony smirks, slamming his beer bottle down a little too hard on the table. It slushes and some of it spills.

  Maybe I shouldn’t say anything now. Maybe I should just call the evening of the trip and tell them I’m sick or something. But then, I’m sure somehow it will get out that I went to the wedding with Tania.

  I wouldn’t want Tania feeling like I had to hide it from my friends, so it’s perhaps best to cough it up now.

  “There’s a chance he might. Have you seen that girl move?” Bradford nods his head, and it’s clear from the horny hound dog expression on his face that he remembers well how she moves from the times he’s had her.

  I don’t know if I’d like that. I would hate it. Being with a woman who’d been with all the guys and then knowing that they were sitting in the bar talking about it after. I guess it’s different in this situation. Candi’s a stripper. And, fuck, I don’t know what streak of morality has worked its way into me, but it’s there.

  Tony lands a punch on my arm when I pull a cigarette from my jacket pocket and tuck it behind my ear. I don’t smoke often. Just sometimes to take the edge off, but I nearly always smoke a cigar when I meet up with my dad and brothers.

  It’s a thing we do.

  Tony doesn’t like it so I’m going to go outside for a few minutes so he can’t complain.

  “Hey, thought you quit.” He winces and Bradford laughs.

  “I just need to cool off.” I chuckle, standing up.

  “Why’s that?”

  “Because I can’t make it to Vegas, and you guys are gonna chew me out,” I reveal, and decide when I see the looks on their faces that I need to light up now.

  Tony looks like he’s gonna lose his shit.

  “You what?” he fumes, and Bradford stares at me open-mouthed.

  We’d been planning this trip since last year when the football season started. Another one of my ideas. Looks like even with the good news they’re gonna take it hard.

  “Hey, we got good news, don’t look like that,” I remind him.

  “You just said you’re not going to Vegas. What do you expect us to look like?”

  “Plus, with it being your idea and all, of course we’d be a tad thrown that you’re not coming,” Bradford adds. “Let’s hear it. This excuse better be good.” He tilts his head to the side, allowing his dark locks to drift to the side of his face. He always wears his hair way too long and usually looks like a shaggy dog. For some reason, the ladies like it.

  I’m the sleek, clean-cut guy with the faux hawk.

  “I’m gonna go with Tania to her friend’s wedding,” I answer, and they both stare at me with deadpanned expressions like I just spoke a foreign language.

  “Excuse me?” Tony stares me down, and I raise my palms.

  “I’m going to Tania’s friend’s wedding.”

  “Dude, when I said be there in front of her when she opens her eyes, I didn’t think you were going to ditch Vegas,” Tony laments.

  I release a ragged sigh. “I’m not ditching you. She needs me.”

  “What am I missing here, guys? Does she need you more than usual?” Bradford chimes in. He doesn’t know what happened, and I’m not going to blurt it all over town.

  “Her asshole prick of a boyfriend is a cheater,” Tony answers, and I’m thankful when he doesn’t elaborate.

&nb
sp; Bradford laughs. “So you’re going in for the rescue and the girl?”

  I don’t know why he’s the second person to assume I’d do that. “No.”

  Tony laughs at me. “Bro…you two are so oblivious.”

  “We are not. I’m just going to be there for her because she needs me. We can do Vegas another time. I wouldn’t feel like I could go out partying when she’ll have to go to the wedding by herself.”

  That was it. I didn’t have any ulterior motives at all. I just knew how she would feel. I would feel the same if it were me, especially if I knew people would be expecting me to be there with the person I’d been dating for the last two years.

  Her friends will know me when they see me, but at least Tania won’t have to feel that discomfort of being on her own. Not with me there.

  “Okay, I get it.” Tony nods, and I relax a little.

  Bradford just gives me a shrug. “Looks like it’s just going to be the two of us, Tony,” he states with a chuckle.

  “Probably, but hey, we’re gonna be rich, so that’s reason enough to get completely wasted and live it up.” Tony raises his beer bottle. I can just imagine the craziness. I planned to go wild and get wasted too. Tania does need me, though, and that’s reason enough to sacrifice Vegas.

  Someone calling my name turns my attention to the bar, and I see Rachel practically bouncing toward me.

  When she gets to me, she doesn’t stop bouncing, and the recent work she’s had on her tits makes them move all by themselves.

  She jumps on me like we’re long-lost lovers and captures my mouth for a kiss, practically assaulting my mouth right there in front of everyone.

  Fuck...this is the sort of thing I want to avoid. This expectation. She can’t do shit like this because we aren’t together that way.

  “I totally missed you,” she bubbles, tucking a lock of her blonde hair behind her ear. She gives me a wide smile, circles her arms around my neck, and tightens her legs around my waist. “Want to make up for it now? I have every kind of flavor condom in my bag.”

  It’s like some sort of omen or something. I’m about to answer when I glance over my shoulder and see Tania coming into the bar with her friend from work. Celine. She’s with Celine. Sometimes they come here.

  Tania’s eyes land on me. Me holding Rachel. Rachel in my arms who is practically rubbing herself on me and shoving her tits in my face.

  Although Tania gives me the usual smile of acknowledgment, when she sees me with a woman, there’s a dimness in her expression that looks off.

  I notice it from all the way over here and feel guilty, although I know I shouldn’t.

  I set Rachel down and focus on her.

  “Hey, I can’t tonight,” I answer, and she looks disappointed.

  “Oh, okay, maybe we can reschedule. How about tomorrow?” Rachel asks.

  Great. Looks like I have my own Candi. If I say I’ll call her she’ll get her hopes up then get upset when I don’t. This is already making me sound like an asshole. If I say no, it cuts us off, and this will probably be it.

  She’s looking at me with her bright green eyes staring back, hopeful I’ll say yes. The guys are staring holes into me. Any second now I’ll combust just from Tony’s penetrating glare.

  “Look Rachel, that’s not really a good idea.” That’s all I say and pray she can take the hint that I don’t want to hurt her.

  She does. The crestfallen look on her face tells all.

  “Okay…I’ll just wait for you to call me then.” She nods and walks away.

  I think that was supposed to be the right thing, yet I feel like a prick. I glance back to the guys and see both are gazing on at me with a mingle of suspicion and mischief.

  “Did you see that, Bradford?” Tony smirks first.

  “I saw. If I were a betting man and liked to take risks, I would have placed some kind of bet for sure. Must be a cold day in hell for Nicholas Andrews to turn down the gorgeous Rachel.”

  I sigh and look from one to the other. “I’m gonna go.”

  “After her, or the other one?” Tony says, glancing in the direction Tania went. He just loves this, that he’s right. I won’t admit to shit.

  “I’m going home,” I tell them and back away.

  I’ve had enough of them and women for the week.

  I’ve had more than enough of women.

  From finding out about damn Louise and her new guy to calling Rachel, to Tania turning up on my doorstep wearing nothing but a coat and stilettos.

  I’m checking out now.

  “See you, tomorrow guys,” I say and make my move before either can answer.

  Before I get to the door I glance down and look for Tania. She’s sitting in a little booth by the pool tables with Celine. They just look like they’re talking.

  The look she gave me tonight was one I’d seen before, many times.

  It told me how much of a playboy she thinks I am, and tonight showed I’m still that.

  The past and the note aside, I know she’s never going to want a playboy, and just like before, I want her to do better than me.

  Tania

  I think Nick left with that woman. It shouldn’t bother me. I shouldn’t even be thinking about it. I know what he gets up to, and I know to turn a blind eye.

  Or, for tonight, place my attention back to my friend, who is doing her best to cheer me up.

  Celine has been great. All day she’s been making sure I was fine and bringing me up to speed with the details I missed from yesterday.

  Better than that was coming here, but we went shopping first and had our nails done.

  “I love it here!” Celine bubbles.

  I look across to where she’s gazing and see her making eyes with a seriously hot blond guy who is checking her out.

  “Celine, is that supposed to be news to me?” I smile back. “We all kind of like it here.”

  “Well, I figured there’ll be more guys for us now that Abby is hitched. I’ve decided to share the attention with you once again.” She raises her glass of wine and giggles.

  “That’s real nice of you.”

  “How are you feeling now?”

  “I don’t know. Some days are worse than others.” Today was just day two but it feels like it happened a long time ago. I had to tell her what happened with Owen yesterday when I called to let her know that I’d left work with Nick. “I guess I still have a bit of time before I can feel anything close to myself.”

  I don’t think I’ll feel like myself again for a long time.

  What will hurt me more is sulking and dwelling on it. I’m not about to magically feel better about Owen, but his verbal assault on me has pushed me in the right direction.

  Instead of pain, I feel hurt and angry. I’ve gone from love to hate, swayed like the wind in the direction he shoved me. It was that last thing he said. That last round of evil when he told me I was nothing.

  When he said he wasn’t serious about me, it was enough to wear me down. But calling me nothing, and telling me I was just pussy, did it.

  “I’m just taking it one step at a time.”

  “Yes, that’s the spirit. And it’s so nice of Nick to offer to go with you to the wedding.”

  “Yeah, it is.” I smile, and she glances over to where Nick was. He’s still not there so I’m assuming he left with that woman.

  “Wasn’t that Nick we saw when we came in?” Celine asks, pulling me from my thoughts.

  I smile. “Yeah, that was him. We have this unwritten code. If we’re with a date, we just acknowledge each other and don’t interfere,” I explain.

  She nods, but I see she thinks it’s weird. “You don’t say hi at all?”

  “I used to, but his girlfriends tend to dislike me. That one looked like she might.” She also looked like the same old skanky women he goes for.

  “Oh… I see.” Curiosity fills her face now, and I know what she’s going to ask me even before she opens her mouth. It’s either going to be the same question she
occasionally asks about Nick or something similar that’s not too outlandish given my recent situation. “Don’t you find it a little strange sometimes? I mean, I won’t lie, there’s no way I could have a friend who’s that hot and just…well, just be friends.”

  I start to laugh. “Maybe it’s because we were practically born together. He’s like a brother to me.”

  “Hmmm,” she answers, which is her way of giving a non-answer. Then she enhances the non-answer by taking a sip of her drink.

  “What? Celine, don’t do that flimflam with me,” I say with a chuckle.

  “Flimflam?” she giggles. “I haven’t heard that one in a while. My grandma says that.”

  “Mine too.”

  “Okay, please don’t get mad.” She inclines her head to the side. “I’m just making an observation. I know what Owen meant to you, even if he turned out to be an asshole. I just think you don’t look at Nick the way you’d look at your brother.”

  I rest my head back against the cool leather back of the booth and look at her. I’m twenty-eight years old, and this isn’t the first time someone’s said that to me. I doubt it will be the last.

  “I think if this was another life, maybe we’d be something more than what we are,” I begin. It’s the first time that I’ve said something like that to her. “I don’t know if I want that because while he’s my friend and I’ve shared this magical relationship with him, I know the other side of him. I know the secrets and the craziness he’s gotten up to.”

  “We all have our craziness. He seems to adore you. Maybe it doesn’t have to be another life. Maybe it could be this life, and this thing with Owen could open something you never factored in before,” she imparts with a warm smile.

  “I don’t know. I don’t think I’d want to lose what we have. That’s what would worry me. Pull that away and then he’s just like every other guy who’s looking for fun.”

  She chuckles. “You can’t blame a guy for that. Would it be such a bad thing to have fun with a guy like him? You told Abby last year to stop looking for the soul mate and date. You basically told her to get a life.”

  I was fairly certain that conversation was between me and Abby. “And how did you come by my words of wisdom?”